Mail on Sunday!

Firstly, something lightheared from the Mail on Sunday. It would appear Lembit Opik, Liberal Democrat "entertainer" has been shagging one of the cheeky girls.

This man, currently engaged to irritating ITV weather presenter Sian Lloyd cleary has no taste or perhaps he's been taking a leaf out of CK's book and been hitting the sauce.

Is there any other explanation?

And now for something far more entertaining, seems the Labour Party are finally getting the message.

According to the paper -

- Labour's standing is so low that the party's only hope of recovering may be to abandon Mr Brown and 'move to a new generation' by picking a much younger new leader - though it warns of the perils of being 'disloyal' to the 'greatly respected' Chancellor.

- The public believes the party is riven by 'internal conflicts' and shows a 'lack of grip and competence on key issues' such as Iraq, the NHS and immigration.

- People who voted Labour at the last Election 'are moving across' to the Conservatives and Labour is floundering 'on every major issue'.

- Mr Blair faces a 's*** or bust' decision on how to stop the rot.

Sorry Labour, you have had your chances to regain some credibility and failed every time.

Even Jesus Christ himself could not save your chances at the next election.

That said, I'd vote for Gordon Brown if he arranges for Tony Blair to be charged and convicted in the Cash for Honours scandal then sent to the Hague for trial at the International Criminal Court.

Other than that, Its looking like i'm giving the main parties a miss in the next few elections. You're all a bunch of twats who don't deserve a single vote.